My Whole Expanse I Cannot See…

I formulate infinity stored deep inside of me…
Archive for May 6th, 2009


May 06th, 2009 | Category: Life

So, today I went for a manicure. I see these tiny Asian ladies who don’t speak a lick of English, but they smile and nod a lot. I’m getting a fresh trache on Friday, so I didn’t want to go in with hideous nails…


It’s a small indulgence, but it’s oddly important. See, whenever my nails go bad it almost certainly means that life has gone bad, I’m either really sick, or astonishingly depressed. I’m often depressed these days, but not so much that I don’t care about the little things that make me, well, me.

Do you have any such gauges, little things that mean you’re still yourself?


God loves us, maybe…

May 06th, 2009 | Category: Life,Opinions,Random Thought

I’m not a religious fellow. I’m Catholic enough to believe in Hell, and that I’ll probably go there. God and I aren’t really pals lately. Still, I love talking about religion.

So, Catholics believe in God the Father, God the Son (Jesus) and the Holy Ghost. They’re three separate beings, but they add up to the One True God. Nobody really knows how this is possible, it’s just supposed to be believed. It’s supposed to be taken on faith that They’re separate, but One.

Now, God of the Old Testament was often pretty harsh and vengeful, He fucked over plenty of people. Jesus, His Son, however, was all about love and forgiveness. Jesus, the Prince of Peace. The Holy Ghost is also supposed to be quite loving, very kind. Currently, They’re all said to be in Heaven, Three as One.

I often wonder if just because Jesus loves us perfectly and forever, couldn’t God still be hardcore and fuck us over when He feels like it? Could the One God actually hate us? Of course, He can’t hate us if He doesn’t exist at all.

Personally, I believe in God, but I don’t think He cares one way or another what happens to us. What about you?