My Whole Expanse I Cannot See…

I formulate infinity stored deep inside of me…

Sep 13

Liquid fire

He drank her in like liquid fire, the sight of her, the feel of her skin.

He drank breathlessly, slowly, knowing all the nexts.

She’ll stay until she goes.

He’ll burn and burn until time turns him to ash.

6 comments

6 Comments so far

  1. Elena September 13th, 2013 11:24 pm

    Awesome to see a poem. I think this one is one of my favorites, you distilled the ideas an feelings down to their essence. It’s beautiful. I love “knowing all the nexts. She’ll stay until she goes.”

  2. Don September 14th, 2013 12:33 am

    I like the poem; it is sexy and kind of self-destructive, but… Don’t get wrathful, but I’m not a fan of the line, “She’ll stay until she goes.” Yes, she probably will, as will all of us and everything.. It’s a bit too clever. And, it’s too short.

    I think the poem would be better without it. The last line is strong and fits with the other lines without that interruption. Whether she’s there or not, the addiction and self-destruction is the part that strikes me as memorable.

  3. John September 14th, 2013 12:50 am

    Beautiful, truly beautiful.

    When I first read it, I read it in a literal sense. Then I took a pause and read it again and again.

    I parsed each line out into their individual components and realized that she was only a moment in time in his life, yet she so profoundly affected him that he will only find peace from her when he breathes his last breath. Even then I think she will still haunt him.

    I venture to guess the he is you, and the she is…

  4. michael September 14th, 2013 1:04 am

    Don: I don’t like arguing with one of my favorite English teachers, but I will. :-p

    The way it is, I don’t think it works WITHOUT that line. That line’s his next, his torment. She’s elusive, gives no sense of being his tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow, which is what he wants. He has the time she gives him, and he takes it because he can’t not, but ultimately, he knows he’ll burn away without her.

  5. michael September 14th, 2013 1:47 am

    I’m glad people are liking this, thinking about it, trying to puzzle it out.

    I might write longer version, this was more akin to a quick sketch.

  6. maria X (Mrs. Xenick in your school life) September 14th, 2013 7:39 am

    i like the poem too – i love that you put something unexpected. You guys were up late last night! I don’t ever question poetry, which is why i am not an English teacher! 🙂
    M