My Whole Expanse I Cannot See…

I formulate infinity stored deep inside of me…
Archive for October 30th, 2009

Let you in

October 30th, 2009 | Category: Attempted Poetry,Creative Flash

I want to let you in, to hand you the key to me.

I want you to see all my locked rooms, the lonely places people never see. They’re all dark, dusty, full of hidden things. I want to show you the rooms that keep my secrets, my fears, the dreams too stupid to show anyone else.

I’ve locked so many rooms, guided people away from the things I don’t trust to anyone. The things I didn’t trust to anyone, until you showed up one day.

I want you to see everything, to know everything and maybe stay awhile. I want you to stay, though I want most people to go.

I want to let you in, to hand you the key to me. It’s scary wanting something so much, scary to feel so much trust. You might not take the key, you might not like what you find inside. You might say, “Goodbye, nice try.” So much I don’t know, but I want to let you in.

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Open mic night

October 30th, 2009 | Category: Life

Last night was my very first open mic night. There’s this little cafe in down-town St. Petersburg, Cafe Bohemia, and every Thursday night is open mic night. They have a stage set up in this really pretty outdoor courtyard for poets and musicians to do their thing under the starry night sky. I found out about it totally by accident, but it was exactly the sort of thing I’d been wanting to find for so long, a place for creative types to just put there stuff out there for a live audience. Applause are different than blog comments. A silent audience says more than a post with no comments at all. So, there was one other writer, Jimmy, and a bunch of musicians, generally really good musicians. I picked out seven pieces of my flash fiction/poetry…

Suicide Party


Brown eyes, and a kiss

A beautiful fix

For her

The push

A nothing of a prayer

I just needed a voice for my words. Jimmy, being a writer and all, with his own poems to read later, he let me borrow his voice. He read my stuff well, and the audience responded the same. I got decent applause for each. I heard one fellow say of Golems, “That was was haunting.” It felt good to put my stuff right in front of people, scary and exciting, all at once. Some musicians played next, then Jimmy read his stuff, then more musicians played.   The place had such a good vibe, people having a really great time. I showed off some writing. Some friends were there, I talked to them. I met some new people. I stayed to close the place, and went home to nothing but my thoughts.