I can’t take it anymore
I wasn’t going to write anything, I didn’t think The Dark Knight Rises is even worth slamming, but tv changed my mind.
In an ad for The Dark Knight Rises (Rises for short), apparently some reviewer called it “one of the best films ever made.” Yes, I’m certain that every thirty-four year-old living in his mom’s basement thought it was fucking epic, but putting it up there with Cool Hand Luke, Casablanca, Doubt, even The Dark Knight, is a complete, astonishing joke. Rises is, at least in my head, one of the most boring movies ever made. At almost three hours long, it really felt like seven. The action sequences were flat, complete with contrived jumps for sport-bikes. The villain, Bane, was dry and absolutely pointless. I can’t say enough to fully capture how painfully bad The Dark Knight Rises is, I couldn’t wait to leave the theater.
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