My Whole Expanse I Cannot See…

I formulate infinity stored deep inside of me…

Jan 7

Tattoo #14

Category: Life,Tattoos

So, somewhere in December while I was busy being astonishingly depressed, I got my fourteenth tattoo.

I was feeling particularly lonely, down, very uneasy about pretty much everything, kind of just staying “okay” as best I could from one day to another. The worst part was that I didn’t see many reasons why “tomorrow” would be any better. That is a really horrible sensation. I felt exactly like this tattoo and the song from which it came…


It’s my third Nirvana related tattoo, it’s my least happy tattoo, but it’s honest.


8 Comments so far

  1. Trevor January 7th, 2009 7:55 pm

    I quite sad to you continue to choose to wallow in your vat of self-pity. I feel dejected, miserable, bored, and anxious, BUT I fight it with whatever little might I have every day! It is not easy. I do look long and hard at what is good and I can always find at least one thing. Mike you can too.

  2. michael January 7th, 2009 8:12 pm

    Trevor, I’m really glad you know so much about me and the lack of fight in me. Your daily battle is a personal inspiration. Thank you.

  3. trevor January 8th, 2009 12:28 am

    Sarcasm, self-pity, seasoned with salty smarminess…Go mike go!

  4. Jennifer January 8th, 2009 12:59 am

    It is weird to me that people keep selectively choosing your “melancholic” posts to tell you how 100% negative you are. As if there aren’t other posts.

  5. michael January 8th, 2009 4:06 am

    Look, Trevor, I’m personally going through a rather dark period, lots of changes and losses. It’s been difficult, I’m not perfect, and I KNOW that, really. I cope by writing whatever’s in my head, happy, melancholy, astonishingly dark, whatever, so long as it’s honest. I don’t ask for pity or sympathy, I don’t ask for anything. We all cope differently. I definitely don’t go around telling people how to live or feel.

    Jennifer, you understand, I appreciate that.

  6. Trevor January 8th, 2009 6:26 pm

    Sad to see that you don’t want help or to learn anything from anybody that may have gone through or is still going through a dark period themselves. Just trying to let you know what I do to snap the F out it! I too have very dark, painfully sad, woefully melancholy thoughts, but when they keep dragging me to the depths of the gutter I do try to fight them and put them aside, so I can come out the other side. Oops sorry! I did it again. Just ignore my insight.

  7. michael January 9th, 2009 1:43 am

    Trevor, you’re talking under the assumption that I don’t do anything positive, that I simply sit at home with my 27 cats, gently sobbing. That is totally wrong.

    Second, your “insight” seems to involve you telling me that I pity myself and what-not.

  8. Camii September 24th, 2010 8:28 pm

    I know that horrible sensation, I’m feeling it right you.. I know what you mean by saying you couldn’t find reasons why tomorrow would be better, and it particularly sucks..I just feel sooo lonely and down, and I honestly don’t know why, but I just can’t find anything good about this life in this shallow world we’re living in… So anyway, I know THAT feeling, and it’s great that you found such a cool way to express the way you felt 🙂 you know, sometimes is better to be a bit negative than being a positive douche..So you rock man