My Whole Expanse I Cannot See…

I formulate infinity stored deep inside of me…

Oct 3

Coming Blindness

Category: Life

Later today I’m going to see Blindness, and I’m thinking it will be amazing. I love society ending disaster fiction, so Blindness should be up my ally.

I’ve written about it before, but I feel that there’s a certain appeal to the fall of society, particularly with zombies. There are certain freedoms gained when all that matters is survival, no more schedules, or money, people are forced to focus on what’s really important. Disaster also tends to show the extremes of human nature, good and terrible. I always enjoy thinking about how people might react under astonishingly extreme circumstances. I’ve had to see how I’d react under such circumstances, my own personal zombies.

Blindness should be very interesting, almost, if not definitely, claustrophobic. In some ways, mass blindness could be more terrifying than zombies, more inescapable than the walking dead. Terror without the immediacy of death.

I have different ideas about death now, ideas that are still evolving. I mean, I don’t want to die, yet I feel like at least it’s a possible end of horror and pain. I say possible because I don’t honestly know what happens after we die. Heaven, Hell, absolute nothingness, I don’t know. I know that both times I really almost died I don’t remember being afraid until I woke up again. When I am afraid, that point of not remember, that lack of awareness has almost been a comfort, knowing that I’ll get there, but at the same time, I don’t want to get there.


2 Comments so far

  1. laura October 3rd, 2008 1:40 pm

    speaking of what happens after we die– one of my boyfriend’s co-workers has this theory that when we die, we don’t go to heaven or hell, we’re just put in this place where we face the quantities of our life– tangible and intangible. How much garbage we’ve created, how many t-shirts we’ve owned, how many beers we’ve drank, how many times we’ve laughed, how many people we’ve loved/hated– i think of it as a conveyor belt that goes by and you just are standing there watching it all. what happens afterward is unclear, maybe you start all over again. with a new life, that is.

  2. Amanda October 5th, 2008 9:17 am

    I already read that you liked the movie, which is really exciting to hear. I haven’t decided if I’m going to see it because the book was so deeply disturbing (and yet fascinating) that it troubled my mind for weeks. I would highly recommend the book, especially based on how much you enjoy that particular story-line.

    By the way, hi – I found your journal because I’m a TAL super-fan and really enjoyed that particular TV episode. It was a masterful show, which owed much to your intelligence, openess and introspection (and of course, the talent of the TAL folks). I hope you’ll forgive me for lurking so long.