My Whole Expanse I Cannot See…

I formulate infinity stored deep inside of me…

Mar 30

PR for God

Category: Creative Flash

Following a report that, “God’s a sadistic fuck who let His only Son commit suicide for the press coverage,” God’s press secretary issued the following statement.

“God does in no way condone the act of suicide. Contrary to recent reports, Christ did not commit the act of suicide, but rather, an act of Free Will and Faith in His Father. God judges all, and judges Christ’s actions to be completely free of sin. None may question His judgment, because He said so. Amen.

Neither God, or Christ were available for further comment, as reports indicate that They’ve hopped a train for the coast, accompanied by the Holy Ghost.

5 comments

5 Comments so far

  1. Alex Carnegie March 30th, 2009 11:17 am

    I was hoping for a followup statement from the friendly ghost tbh

  2. redandjonny March 30th, 2009 12:42 pm

    God is a megalomaniac with serious abusive relationship problems. He should seek counseling.

  3. Angie March 30th, 2009 3:19 pm

    New reports are coming in that this Trio has been spotted crossing the border into Mexico. As they crawled under the fence, Jesus allegedly flipped the bird at the border patrol and shouted “We’re more appreciated by latinos anyway! Ay dios mio!” They haven’t been seen since.

  4. espo March 30th, 2009 10:03 pm

    genius

  5. Dani February 16th, 2010 3:49 pm

    LAWL! 😛