My Whole Expanse I Cannot See…

I formulate infinity stored deep inside of me…

Mar 16

My old self

Category: Life

I have to admit, I’m rather excited about the NeuroSwitch and what it could do. I feel like I could be my old self again, I feel a little of my old arrogance, my confidence. It’s good to be a bit arrogant sometimes, it takes a little arrogance to do things that seem impossible. The last few months have been slowly and quietly breaking me down, as it’s gotten harder and harder to write.

Words are so powerful, they can create reality just as surely as any physical act. Words properly arranged into sentences can inspire fear, sorrow, love, so many emotions. Writing is really the only thing I do well, it’s how I’ve accomplished things that mean everything to me. It’s how I meet people, it’s how I go places, the written word is entirely important to me. Without writing I’m a living corpse, I’m nothing. If I couldn’t write, every dream I have would be ash. I’d never find another lover, or an end to loneliness, I’d have no future that I want. These ideas have terrified me since December, but not today. Not right now.


5 Comments so far

  1. Karen (the first one) March 16th, 2009 10:59 pm

    You are going to be the most awesomest cyborg ever created. I can’t wait to see what you can do with something like that.

    In other news, science nerds are hot.

  2. Will March 16th, 2009 11:33 pm

    You do more than write well, Mike.
    You Live , Well.
    Better than Many.
    You Think, and are able to contextulize, better than most, and, you do inspire me. You remind me of Hunter Thompson in a way with your no apologies honesty, you live and act like you think.

    “One of the few ways I can almost be certain I’ll understand something is by sitting down and writing about it. Because by forcing yourself to write about it and putting it down in words, you can’t avoid having to come to grips with it. You might be wrong, but you have to think about it very intensely to write about it. So I use writing as a learning tool.”

    Then again, he also said:
    “I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence or insanity to anyone, but they’ve always worked for me.”

    Rock On Mike. Spring, is here.
    Metaphor the shit out of that.

    I look forward to continuing to see how your life continues to unfold and all the people that come into it and enjoy your writing.

  3. Jennifer March 17th, 2009 12:18 am

    I’m really glad you’re finding something to replace the thumb switch, and that you’ll still be able to communicate. It’s got to be really fucking scary to think about losing that ability.

  4. Alex Carnegie March 18th, 2009 7:21 pm

    Very good news, I’m glad for you Michael.

  5. […] it seems that even Michael’s thumb is going to betray him {link}.  He’s in the process of switching to a new input system whereby sensors will read the […]